I think strict parents make for secretive kids. If kids feel they don't have a voice, they resort to subterfuge. Rule following is important, but the rules should be negotiable. Having a tight leash and proving that you're in charge can't be more important than communicating with her.

There is obviously something she feels she needs and maybe doesn't feel comfortable telling you. You say she's a good kid, so talk to her. Trust her a little. Let her have a voice in the rules governing her life. All she's being taught right now is to think of ways to outmanuever you.


Mom of two amazing sons and one amazing daughter, lifelong reader of anything and everything, (really) slow runner, and a terrible cook.

Love podcasts or audiobooks? Learn on the go with our new app.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store